This is at least a cousin of the "How to submit a manuscript" story line
currently occupying my attention. And hopefully yours. Happy chuckle.
1. Avoid alliteration. Always.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
4. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
5. One should never generalize.
6. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
7. Be more or less specific.
8. Sentence fragments? Eliminate.
9. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
10 Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
11. Who needs rhetorical questions?